1 : PEOPLE go green with envy because they think the grass is greener on the other side.
2 : YOU cannot fight everyone but you can make everyone die of laughter.
3 : WHEN you attach a label make sure it can come off because things can change.
4 : A FRIEND is someone who is afraid of letting you down but never does.
5 : IF YOU have no problem, you've got a problem.
6 : PEOPLE choose to be alone, people choose to be lonely.
7 : BETTER the Devil you know than the Devil you don't but he cuts deeper.
8 : NOTHING is free except what comes from within you.
9 : THERE'S no such thing as an open and shut case unless you've lost the key.
10 : IF SOMEONE who is strong attacks someone who is weak he is weak.
11 : HATE is entwined with love.
12 : FOR SALE / TO LET or to bargain.
13 : IF YOU ask for something you have to say "Please", if you want to get something you have to please.
14 : YOU cannot buy happiness but you have to pay the price.
15 : YOU don't judge how rich someone is by how much money he has but by how much he wants, the less he wants the richer he is.
16 : YOU'RE young as you look... and you're still looking.
17 : WHEN you lend money to a friend you usually lose your friend plus interest.
18 : IF SOMEONE deliberately overcharges you by a little, pay him a little more.
19 : LAUGH and the world will laugh with you, cry and you cry alone. But you have to cry before you can laugh.
20 : ALL'S fair in love and war but you'll have trouble keeping her and you'll lose the peace.
21 : WHEN you advertise something make sure that what you are advertising is generally well known- NOT including yourself.
22 : WHEN you're in the smallest room of the house you're nearest to God.
23 : WHEN you employ a secretary be prepared to let her be privy to your secrets.
24 : PERSON writing to his big family abroad: "Love from all of me to all of you".
25 : BED/SIT. You don't sit on a bed.
26 : LOVE all. 0-0.
27 : TRUE love is never being apart but suffering while you are.
28 : I'M looking at Sue. Sue's looking at Tom. Tom's looking at Kathy.
29 : DON'T bite the hand that feeds you unless you're taking the poison out of the hand.
30 : ASK me no questions and I'll tell you no lies. I won't make an allusion to the illusion.
31 : I KNOW I love you. You know I love you. Let's compromise.
32 : THE lady will not do a U turn. Well, maybe two.
33 : BEFORE we can wave the handkerchief, we have to have a cold.
34 : IT'S the real thing but there's little difference between reality and unreality.
35 : YOU'RE an angel from any angle.
36 : TELL someone you love that she has something on her lips and then kiss her.
37 : NON-ALCOHOLIC to his girlfriend: "I'll only drink wine from your lips."
38 : GIRLS at the seaside: Too young to handle, too old to hold.
39 : DON'T get personal with personnel.
40 : MOTHER - there's no other.
41 : GIRL with tear in her jeans at the knee is told by passer-by: I think you have a tear in your jeans.
42 : GENTLEMEN don't mind brunettes who are dark. They sometimes like red-heads because they are hot-blooded. But they prefer blondes because they are never fair.
43 : A FRIEND in need is a fiend indeed.
44 : WHERE'S my pen? Why is the stationery never stationary?
45 : ARE you seeing him? Well, usually I close my eyes when I do it.
46 : TO A valentine: I know it's meant to be a secret but I had to secrete it from my heart.
47 : A TAX is money levied on a person's property, business or pleasure. A TAXI levies money to get to a person's property, business or pleasure.
48 : MERRY XMAS but never be cross.
49 : HOME is where the heart is but the blood runs faster.
50 : YOU can't fool all the people all the time but you can fool some of the people some of the time and make a living.